Pupdate #4: The Big Indecision
It's been pointed out to me today that I might be projecting the current stresses of my work life onto my pet life and that last night's 4 a.m. post about giving him up is maybe a bit premature. I have some very wise and insightful friends. However, I am still wracked with doubt at my ability to properly raise this guy and have our lives integrate with each other's, so please be patient with me as I go through this experience.
I want to make this whole process as transparent, inclusive and informative as possible, so that anyone reading these posts who is considering adopting a dog, can understand how way-more-than-feeling-prepared you actually think is necessary. The tasks for personal growth I'm taking this year will clearly be much bigger challenges than I expected. Looking ahead to a life with or without Winston, I can see both possibilities. I can also see potential for huge regret in finding him a new home.
What has become obvious is that I make decisions about my personal life in dramatic contrast to my work life. At work, I try to make my decisions with a lot of foresight and consider how they will impact everyone in my company and how those decision may or may not set precedent. In my personal life, it seems I'm much more impulsive. It seems that's a character trait I'm going to have to work on.
The goal of my list of 100 challenges is all about forcing myself to have new experiences and improve my quality of life. I guess the question is this: Am I being too short-sighted and only looking at the impact on my quality of life as it currently is and not examining how Winston may improve my quality of life in the future?
I'd love to hear your opinions.
Status: Filled with doubt and vacillating between keeping him here or finding him a new home. Please have patience with me on this journey; I am clearly conflicted.
N.B. If you offer your opinions and comments, I would appreciate that you not do so in an angry manner. I'm putting myself out in the open and recognize that comes with scrutiny, but angry voices are more difficult to hear.